Penny For Your Likes: Your So-Called "Life" on Social Media

Have you ever looked at someone else’s life online, and for a  few self sabotaging hours split second you began to envy their life? 

Of course Sally on Facebook has the perfect body – she’s naturally a dancer and somehow manages to find an hour every day to hit the gym and take countless selfies during her session! Bob from university just got a major promotion and also just spent the last three months backpacking through Europe while you’re still slinging it in your retail job from high school trying to make ends meet. And Sue, the one with the perfect relationship – her partner just proposed to her in the most romantic way possible – although you didn’t even notice at first since by the looks of her instagram she gets flowers and poems delivered every Friday anyways! She makes it perfectly clear to keep you all informed of that, with the umpteen pictures of her and her beau riding off into the horizon every day.

I’m no stranger to social media envy. I’ve let myself get caught up in it, allowed myself to wallow in self pity as I’m staring at Susy’s perfect abs…or was it Sally? All I know is they ain’t mine!

I’ve also allowed myself to be swayed by it – making sure to take dozens of snapshots with my pretty girlfriends BEFORE we head out for our nights on the town so that people know we mean business!  I mean, realistically we all know that the night will inevitably end with our hair in sweaty buns, mascara running everywhere and walking around looking for a cheap place we can stuff our faces. This all happened AFTER the group of us sat on a patio of some hip beer garden spending more time on our phones than talking to each other. At least for at least a little bit!

I seem to remember some few weeks ago going to visit a friend, Kristen. During our catch up, I began telling her about my latest interest – a really attractive dude that I met one night in my prime,  with a good head on his PERFECTLY sculpted shoulders and a natural knack for logic and investing and being practical…you know, all those things that I suck at should probably work on!

 I found myself gushing to her about how he has so many things going for him, how he seems to work really hard and how I had no idea why a professional athlete would be interested in someone like me. I better enjoy the ride now as it will SURELY end soon. And I remember her response to all of this very clearly: 

“Meaghan, I have NO idea why you are acting like this dude is such a celeb and is so out of your reach when that’s the way I feel about you! It's weird when YOU talk about people that way. You’re talented and beautiful and so motivated – I feel like HE’S the one who should be enjoying the ride!” (Or something to that effect that made me feel all mushy inside and perplexed all at the same time). 

No doubt, I’m proud of my accomplishments – especially those that have happened within the last year. I’m finding new and exciting ways of becoming a better Meaghan, and I LOVE sharing them with people. But I never considered that the way my life might be portrayed on Instagram/Facebook might impact the way people think of me (in this case, for the positive). 

*(P.S. Kristen and I have been friends for a while, I doubt Facebook caused her to be proud of me, but I'm just using her as an example!) *
At the end of the day, I like sharing good things about my life online because:

 a) I whole heartedly believe other people can do the same

b) Sharing happiness has just always been my thing. I vibrate at a high frequency, I give off that energy into the universe, I like the idea of it and 

c) because sharing all the good shit that happens to you on social media is just…what is supposed to happen….right?

I thought about what Kristen said to me again after I was gushing to her about my hot accomplished friend. Isn’t it strange the way people view us compared to the way we see ourselves?

 Here’s the thing. 

I have a job/hobby that promotes self-promotion. Straight up. The selfies you see of me enjoying a sunset hike – don’t get me wrong – I’m DEFINITELY happy in that moment – but I’ve also probably just spent 5 minutes fiddling around with my phone like a spaz and I probably also just got 12 mosquito bites. And I probably did the selfie when no one was around because – I don’t wanna look like a narcissist! How UNATTRACTIVE!

Bam! I unload it to social media. One like...two likes... 

With my newly posted selfie, All YOU see is Meags, that girl who’s making time for exercise and loving every moment of life.

 (^ Have you ever been that person waiting on likes and comments? I never thought I was... but then why do I check my phone after an upload is complete?)

" GAAAHHHHDDD that girls annoying! Happiness is irritating when it's not mine!" < Have you ever been THAT person? NOT COOL. But haven't we all?

So we’ve distinguished that life isn’t as it always as appears on social media. No brainer. So what?

I guess the reason for writing this is to remind you, and myself, of that. I’m very much aware of the fact that those people on social media who are riding through life in the fancy cars are enjoying themselves. And you know what? Most of them probably earned their fancy cars. But I also want to remind you that it’s nothing to be jealous of. 

Not only are you on your own path, but you also don’t see the ups and downs of Perfects Sues perfect relationship. Everyone loves talking about how much money they won at the casino but they will without fail conceal how much money they spent on the slots before that. CHILL OUT HOMIES. WE ALL SUCK THE SAME AMOUNT. Hahaha totally kidding. 

We all ROCK the same amount! As long as we are doing our part to spread love and positivity. 

On that note, I also encourage you, as I’m sitting behind my computer, to get off yours. I’ve spent the last week up in Northern Ontario with my family where I was completely unplugged, save for the few dinners I had with family friends and got a wifi connection. 

It would be so easy for me to write a blog on how much I enjoyed the lake water. It would be easy for me to talk about how many lessons I learned in my personal development book, You are a Badass (by Jen Sincero), that I sat and finished reading on the beach. I could tell you how many times I took sunset bike rides and ate at cute cafes and busted a gut laughing with my sisters over a drinking game that we somehow lost all of our skill at over the last couple years.  Believe me, all of those things happened!

But you wanna know what I was thinking about at least once every day that I was up there with the people who I love the most?

What was happening on social media? 
What’s happening with Team Beachbody? 
What are my fellow coaches doing? 
How are my challenge groups going? 
What’s everyone up to online?
 How many ab shots has Sally posted on her instagram that I can’t see and compare myself to? 
What girls has my hot new fling been texting since I’m not around to see what he’s up to? 
And what do they look like? 
And are my chances ruined now?

NOT. KIDDING.

It’s a terrible discovery to make. To know that while you could be vibing at a high frequency with your bomb ass family eating bomb ass jelly donuts – you’re also thinking about how many people have inboxed you about an upcoming project, or how you are going to avoid taking any bikini shots this week because you’re bloated from all the beer – which you are angry at yourself for drinking because you are derailing your progress, and you don’t want people to know that you aren’t always on your fitness a-game. (I guess the secrets out now!)

Alas my friends, I write this to you today to tell you that not only am I not perfect, but you and I probably have a shit ton of things in common. 
We’re both obsessed with shit that doesn’t matter.
 We both get caught up in the realties that are only true because we MAKE them true, by choosing to perceive them that way. 
Sometimes, no matter how much positive personal growth affirmations I make, I still feed into negative self-talk. I'm a work in progress, and so are you!
I’d like to explore what else we have in common!

Your assigments for today:

1.     Chill the frack out.

2.     Get off social media for a day. And I don’t mean get off and take a picture of your moonlit dinner so you can post it when you’re back on tomorrow. I mean get off. As in NOTHING. No comparing. No sharing. Just vibe.

3.     Love yourself. You’re doing an awesome job. (Thanks Jen Sincero.)

xo Meags